"I just always had this nagging thought that something was missing and an underlying feeling of unfulfillment. I wanted to make a difference in the world and to make my children proud of me."
Becoming a foster carer has always been in the back of mind, but the time never seemed to be quite right. I have 4 children of my own who have all now grown up and moved out.
I was in banking for 25 years and I enjoyed my job. I had worked my way up over the years and I was happy, settled and didn’t have money worries. I just always had this nagging thought that something was missing and an underlying feeling of unfulfillment. I wanted to make a difference in the world and to make my children proud of me. It sounds a bit morbid I know, but when I’m not here; what do I want people to remember me for? That Alison had a nice house and car? Success in life is not about chasing materialistic things, it's about making memories and being grateful.
I don’t want to have any regrets nor to have not made an impact on the world.
It was a scary prospect to begin with, but then the pandemic hit putting things firmly into perspective. An opportunity for a redundancy package came up at work and I decided it was time to be brave. I had seen a lot of adverts for fostering and decided to go for it.
My family and friends were initially quite shocked when I told them I was going to become a foster carer. It seemed quite a difference in career for me! But once the shock had worn off, they have been nothing but supportive of my journey.
The assessment process took around a year in all, and I continued to work full time the whole way through. Excel Fostering were brilliant at fitting in around my work schedule for appointments. I still found it quite hard as the process was very intense and each call felt like a therapy session.
Once I had been approved, I finished work in the June thinking I might have a bit of a break and a holiday. Nine days later, I received a call about a 2-year-old boy. I said yes and have never looked back. He is still with me now.
I was very nervous before M arrived. I was used to his age group because of my grandchildren, but it was more that I wanted so much for him to feel safe and secure with me. Four previous placements had broken down. I was very conscious of how scary it must be for M coming into a new home again. For around the first month, I was with him 24/7 until he felt settled and during that time, he didn’t sleep very well which was quite tough going for us both.
I can’t describe how much of a joy M has been and how far he has come on since coming to live with me.
To anyone thinking about becoming a foster carer, I would say, go for it! Don’t be scared – isn’t life always scary anyway? It will be a challenge and at times you will wonder if you really can do it. You can! Don’t live with regrets. Your life will change for the better, you will have a new purpose and feel truly fulfilled.
Start the conversation today. Our team of friendly advisors are on hand to answer any foster care questions you may have. We can offer you honest and practical advice that can help you decide if becoming a foster carer is the right path for you.
